An election in the life of a Monster Raving Loony

SOME PEOPLE may say the Monster Raving Loony Party was the most sensible political option to take in the recent general election.Brexit this, Brexit that, Corbyn this, Corbyn that, it may have started to seem a bit repetitive to some.

But what is it like campaigning for votes for a party made famous for fielding candidates such as Screaming Lord Sutch and who had The Raving Mr P, The Mid Bed Minx, Lady Lily The Pink and Baron von Thunderclap representing them at December’s poll?

Well, the Correspondent got to find out through the eyes – the sometimes weary eyes – of Farmin’ Lord F’tang F’tang Dave, who stood against Andrew Gwynne in the Denton and Reddish constituency.

Whatever he said obviously had some effect as he received 324 votes, an increase of 0.3 per cent from 2017!

The day before the big day, on Wednesday, December 11, proved a case of parching up damage.
Not from some ill-advised political statement but from high winds the previous night.

Farmin’ Lord said: “It was all about mending a great hole that emerged in the milking parlour roof after the wind!

“Seeing as everyone’s p***ed off with the whole thing, a less is more attitude could seal victory!”

The day itself saw Boris Johnson romp home to a Conservative majority while Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn was told in no uncertain terms the country did not want him as a leader.

Gwynne himself felt some of the backlash with his majority being cut by more than half from just two years previously.

It did not stop the Farmin’ Lord from stealing the show by acclaiming the winner with his trusty kazoo as he stepped up to make his acceptance speech.

But as the man behind the tune admitted: “That day was a staying awake mission!”

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